Goodbyes Hurt
by beate73
Summary: Bella has to find the strength in her heart to say goodbye even if it rips her apart. AH


**AN:** Not having written anything for a long while, it's hard getting back into the swing of things. But sometimes, inspiration suddenly strikes out of the blue. It did. And here it is. Fair warning - this was hard to write and I did shed a few tears, Sue thought this was sad too, so you might need a tissue, or might not. Big smooch to Sue for looking this ditty over for me. :)

**Disclaimer: **SMeyer is the owner of these characters.

**BPOV**

Sighing, I turned and looked at Edward. He was sound asleep in my bed. I stared at his profile, desperate to memorize it; his pouting lips, his straight nose with a slight bump at the middle from years of wearing glasses, his dark lashes. I let my eyes wander up to his hair, that had lost its fiery redness over the years, it was darker now. In dim light he could pass for a brunette, but in the light the red and the brown fought and the redness won out every time. I lifted my hand to his face and carefully traced his cheekbones. I had always been envious of his pronounced, high cheekbones; wanting them for myself. I let my fingers trace down to his jaw and chin before I wound my arm around his shoulders and held tightly onto Edward.

He was my everything, how was I supposed to let him go? Just the thought of saying goodbye to him made me physically hurt. He would only be gone a year, but with how attached I was to him, it felt like forever. Being away from him for only a few hours each day was hard, I had no idea how I would be able to survive a whole year.

Just the thought of being without Edward was enough to make me cry. Unable to hold back the sobs, they ripped out of me and stirred Edward from his sleep. I felt like I was losing him forever. There was a dread in me that told me that this was it. This was the end of the road for us.

"Shh, Bella. It will be all right. I'll be back. I promise." Edward continued to talk to me, and I calmed down some. I knew he meant every word he said, and I knew he would never be able to keep his promise to me. I begged him to love me one last time before he had to leave, and he complied. He was so sweet and tender it broke my heart even more having to let go of him.

**EPOV**

Saying goodbye to my Bella was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I had told her not to follow me to the train station. I had wanted to say our goodbyes at home. I had wanted her safe in our house when I left. But she was having none of that, claiming she wanted to spend every possible moment she could with me. She begged me not to take that away from her. Looking into her pleading eyes, I was incapable of denying her anything.

She held tightly onto me, it was like she was holding on for dear life. It broke my heart even more thinking about how painful this was for her. I looked into her beautiful face, wanting to leave her with a happy memory. I started humming a song and took a few waltzing steps with Bella in my arms. She quickly picked up on what I was trying to do and soon we were waltzing on the platform.

Just as she was giving me a timid smile it started to rain. Bella looked up at the sky and said, "I guess the heavens know my heart is crying and are showing their solidarity." No sooner had she uttered those words when it was as if the sky opened up and the rain was just pouring down, leaving us drenched in seconds.

Wet like to two drowning cats, we continued our little dance. Finally Bella laughed through her tears as she was staring at my face. "I'm going to miss you so much," she whispered as her eyes burned into mine. Her words finally cracked me, and I couldn't hold back my own tears. I wrapped my arms around her and held her fiercely to me. I knew that this year would be hard on us both, but I knew it would be even worse for Bella. I could only hope she would be all right while I was gone. Once I got back I planned on never leaving her again. It just hurt too much.

It was last call to get aboard, and I had to let go of Bella. Of my life. Swallowing my tears, I knew I had to be strong for her. I wanted her to remember my smile, not my tears. I gave her a fierce, last kiss before I got aboard. I leaned out the window and watched her get smaller as the train pulled away. Soon she was gone from view, but I couldn't stop staring at where I knew she was still standing.

**BPOV**

I stood in the pouring rain, watching as the train left the station. Even after the train was long gone, I couldn't find the energy in me to move my feet. Staring at where I had last seen Edward was my final link to him. Having to go home and sever that link hurt too much. I stayed, standing still until nightfall when my father came to bring me home.

I was right. I never saw again my love. Edward never returned to me. He was flying on a mission three months into his tour when his plane was shot down by the enemy. They never found him.

Edward left me the ultimate gift. A child. A boy. A boy that not only got his father's looks, but also his name. I named him Edward Anthony Jr and told him stories about his daddy every single day before bed. Even if my Edward was gone and never would know that he became a daddy, I wanted his memory to live on with his son.

I still hate goodbyes. They still hurt. But none hurt as much as saying goodbye to my Edward.

**ENDNOTES:** How did I do? Loved it? Hated it? I'd love to hear from you. :)


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